So... let me tell you about my night. You see this thing? It's not cute, or pretty, or pleasant, even though kids think this sucker is a dang flower, it is NOT. It is a dandelion from L. It is not a flower. It is the by-product of the forbidden fruit. And if you don't believe me... Just wait...
Because this "pretty flower" will soon turn into this. And you see those things flying off? SEEDS!!! And you know what they do? They create more. These are like hamsters in the plant world. HAMSTERS!!! They multiply like it's going out of style. Like it's their last dang chance... like every blasted day is their last dang chance to multiply.
And we all did it when were kids... THIS... we did this,
and now.. after I dug tons of them out of the grass last night, I thought... I bet people wanted to kill us... every time we picked one of these and blew it... thinking how cool it was... the neighbor was probably creating a voodoo doll with our name on it. I helped Dave and Nic last night by digging these out of the grass. And really, I didn't mind cause I like to do work at night cause I sit on my rump all day at work, but man... these things are a pain. And, the sad thing is... even though I got them all out, there are more birthing in the ground as we speak. SUCKERS!!! And, Nicole made fun of me last night cause my thumb was doing spasms after using the hoe on grass. I'm not very good at it. Dave said it looked like I'd been golfing on the lawn. Next time I might just do some golfing practice. I'll tell you, who needs a punching bag when you can dig dandelions out of the ground. It was like I had a personal vendetta against each and every one. When I first started I said to Dave "Where's the hoe, Hoe?" LOL!!! So of course then we proceeded into this banter calling each other a hoe for a few minutes. Once I started he came over to "inspect"... I said... "Hey...I'm I good Ho-er". And then I busted up laughing and bent over cause I couldn't stop, you know, thinking I was so funny and all. Get it? Ho-er is like saying Hore with an accent. Anyway... that was my night.
Because this "pretty flower" will soon turn into this. And you see those things flying off? SEEDS!!! And you know what they do? They create more. These are like hamsters in the plant world. HAMSTERS!!! They multiply like it's going out of style. Like it's their last dang chance... like every blasted day is their last dang chance to multiply.
And we all did it when were kids... THIS... we did this,
and now.. after I dug tons of them out of the grass last night, I thought... I bet people wanted to kill us... every time we picked one of these and blew it... thinking how cool it was... the neighbor was probably creating a voodoo doll with our name on it. I helped Dave and Nic last night by digging these out of the grass. And really, I didn't mind cause I like to do work at night cause I sit on my rump all day at work, but man... these things are a pain. And, the sad thing is... even though I got them all out, there are more birthing in the ground as we speak. SUCKERS!!! And, Nicole made fun of me last night cause my thumb was doing spasms after using the hoe on grass. I'm not very good at it. Dave said it looked like I'd been golfing on the lawn. Next time I might just do some golfing practice. I'll tell you, who needs a punching bag when you can dig dandelions out of the ground. It was like I had a personal vendetta against each and every one. When I first started I said to Dave "Where's the hoe, Hoe?" LOL!!! So of course then we proceeded into this banter calling each other a hoe for a few minutes. Once I started he came over to "inspect"... I said... "Hey...I'm I good Ho-er". And then I busted up laughing and bent over cause I couldn't stop, you know, thinking I was so funny and all. Get it? Ho-er is like saying Hore with an accent. Anyway... that was my night.
Got it. I'm glad you entertain yourself so well.
ReplyDeleteYou just kill me. I can't wait to see how many are fully bloomed and ready for me to blow on by Saturday. Bwa ha ha ha ha!
ReplyDeleteGeez. You sound like Grandma (yep, the 88 year old one!) Sawyer just loves Dandies and gma lectures him daily on how they are not a good flower. He gets so upset and comes crying to me "mooommmm! Grandma says she hates Dandelions but I LOVE them!" While I am glad to hear of your ho-er skils I must just shout that we love all the dandelions just as long as they stay at the neighbors ; )
ReplyDeleteTahn you are so flippin funny!!! I think you need to write a book about life and all that it contains!
ReplyDelete