What the heck just happened?

SO... last night Davey asked me if he could stay home with me while Nicole took Dave to Provo, with the rest of the kids. I said yes, but he had to let me watch the Jazz game/Dancing with the Stars. He agreed. Okay... let's reminisce for a moment. Let's think back on the days when Davey thought Aunt Tahnee was freakin' awesome. Ahhhh... those were the days. I have a picture at my desk of him on my shoulders at the zoo... right after I taught him to spit (hey... how else do you teach a 1 year old what a camel says?), and another picture of us at my work party luau... so fun, so cute... SO....AWESOME!
Okay... so a pose a question: How do you go from Awesome Aunt Tahnee rocks my world... to...

THIS...

Davey put this on my back last night. Sweet little Davey did this to Awesome Aunt Tahnee... It's mind baffling! JUST MIND BAFFLING!!!! He thought he was SOOOOO funny too. Then he proceeded to out do him self and created a packet, which I might add, he was anything but subtle when he pushed my head forward and attached it to my back... I left the "packet" on my back for his entertainment for about 10 minutes . Then I took it off to find the following....

Just to clarify I will italicize what these say

"This is my photo"Okay... can you please look at the person in the photo. Pay special attention to his hair. I say "his" because the person is BALD ON TOP! What the...

Next...

"Tahnee's butt"

Okay... there is a funny story behind this picture. So... here is our dialog:
Me: What is this?
Davey: Your butt (he is dying laughing)
Me: Well is that a giraffe?
Davey: (still laughing) Yeah
Me: Well, what? You think my butt looks like a giraffe?
Davey: No, this is your butt (pointing to the oval shape next to the giraffe). I just drew the giraffe so you could see how big your butt was compared to a giraffe.
Me: (jaw drop)

I have to give him credit for creativity and being so thorough. Good thing he's only 8.

Next...
"I Stupid"
This one is my favorite, which is why I graced it with a picture of my head.

"This is the size of my brain"
(note... the pea size circle underneath)

And... can I point out that I do look a little "handicapped" in this picture. LOL. And I am sick, so my nose is stuffed up and I can barely breathe... Which is why I left this picture and didnt' take another one... I thought it was fitting. Davey is laughing his head off when I read this one, and goes
"that probably is the size of your brain" and I was like "ha ha... you're so funny!".

How do kids go from sweet, loving, kind, to freakin rude? And so fast. LOL!
It really was funny. The twirp!

Happiest Halloween EVER

So... this year I ventured out and asked Nic if I could make Keili and Miley's costumes. It was fun. Keili wanted to be Cinderella and Nic and I thought Miley would make a cute Jeanie. I spent a ton of time on Keili's because I didn't have a pattern and I wanted it to look just like Cinderella. I messed up the white hip thingys a couple times so that is what took the most time. Trial n Error... ya know. Davey went as a mummy. Nic did an awesome job with his costume, and Alex was a Lion (see a few pics down).
Here is a good one of all 3. Keili looked SO FREAKING CUTE. I don't think any of these pictures do her justice. I might have gloated a little. Okay... Nic may have told me at one point to come down off my high horse. LOL. But that was only because she killed all the other Cinderella's at the ward party.

Okay... i have to say, that this is what a Jeanie costume will look like when you are making it on a lot of medication. Plus, she wouldn't keep the face cover-uper-thingy on. And I didn't have a pattern for hers either. We all agreed it didn't really look like a Jeanie, but at least it looked like a costume. Eh... you can't win 'em all.Sorry... I have a piece O crap camera...

This one you can see Alex in his lion attire.
This is Alex in the back of the expedition for the trunk or treat. His eyes look kind of freaky in this picture. Pretty fitting for halloween I'd say...
he loves himself some suckers. LOL
Davey... I can't decide if he didn't want his picture taken, if he was sad, or trying to play like a mummy....
Dave taking the girls trunk or treating
After we trunk or treated, we drove to Mom and Dads to suprise them. This is us ringing in the holidays and saying goodbye to Halloween. We grew up listening to the Osmonds Christmas and one of the funnest songs on the album is "It never snows in LA" and Nicoles kids LOVE LOVE LOVE that song....

Tune in...

A bunch of jumpin' jacks...

Friday night Nic and I took the kids to Jumpin' Jacks. We kidnapped two cuties from Coalville and went. Okay... Sarah may have assisted us in kidnapping them by meeting me and cramming them and all their belongs :0) in my car. And I mean ALL THEIR BELONGINGS. LOL! (j/k Sarah). First of all... this is too funny not to tell you guys. I got in trouble by Sarah. Sariah "told one me" because last time, when she had a sleep over, I didn't put the TV on a channle, like Disney. I put on a Disney Movie (Sariah is like me and falls asleep with the TV on), so Sarah told me "Now Tahnee (total sarcasm, with slight reprimanding) You have put the TV on a channel, not on a movie!!!". LOL! Sorry, but it was funny. Okay... so back to the party... when we were on our way, Sariah kept telling me "you know, Me and Bubba are afraid of EVERYTHING." She was a bit nervous, don't you think. Well it took a little coaxing, but Nic started them out on the little bouncy stuff... I had to coax Bubba A LOT more than Sariah. (See Below)Yeah... Riah... she had NO PROBLEM attacking.... WELL.. everything!


BUbba wouldn't come in because he was deathly afriad. I picked him up and he let me hold him and jump, then we put him on the slide and he was good to go after that....


See... Sariah... beating up everything. Here is her fist of furry.
And her karate chop... that tree-a bit, FAT, GONER!!!

She means business... this is a great Sariah stress reliever I think.
We then graduated them to a bigger slide. Again... it took a lot of coaxing on Bubba's part. Well... actually, if we were honest I would say it took me picking him, (his legs may have kicked a few times) and handing over the giant wall to Nic, who then put him on the slide (see below)

And then he was fine.... Silly Bubba.
Miley... she pretty much has no fear. I think Nic's kids sucked all the "lack of fear" genes from the rest of the the family cause MAN... those suckers just climbed all over everything.
Here is Alex... See how excited he is... he is about to go down the slide. Oh... but wait...
Wasn't really all he thought it would be. LOL! This is my favorite picture. Look how scared he is... LOL. He never cried though. I picked him up and he smiled his big Alo smile at me...
Here goes Bubba and Moey again.
Bubba was a champ once he got the first attempt under his belt.
Awe.... Nic, being a kid again. This is a cute picture I think.
I tried to get Moey climbing through this... she's lightning fast... little terd.
We gave all the kids red contact lenses... you know... for effect.

LOL! This is Miley after she got bounced RIGHT OFF the big bouncy ship. She landed on the ground on her butt, gets up (right here) and goes "Mi-yee scared!" LOL! But she never cried.
Keili on the ship slide. Okay... below is a picture of Me, Miley and Sariah. Sariah wanted to go on this slide but wanted me to go with her, so did Miley, you know, after the previous picture of her getting bounced out of the thing. So... we climb up the tunnel to the top. We get to the second to last step and Sariah FREAKS OUT! Literally. Crying. Wanting to go back. There are a herd of kids behind me trying to push past, the terds (one of them Davey by the way) and I'm trying to get Sariah and Miley to just sit up at the top. I had to try to pick them both up, put them on my lap. Sariah is screaming and Miley is crying holding on to me for dear life. It was great times. SO.. this is me finally getting them on my lap and going down the slide, they both cried the whole way. I graduated from Awesome Aunt Tahnee to Awful Aunt Tahnee in a heartbeat. LOL.

Bubba, afraid to go in the big bouncy rainbow. It broke my heart...
He'd sure run underneath it though.
The giant slide. This is so much fun... Davey going for it.
Nic and Davey... and Miley, but you can't see her. You had to push her all the way up... she's too little.

Do you think she looks scared? She went up again right after... LOL
Okay... this is me... at the end. Nic wasn't supposed to take my picture, but she did. At least it's dark. :0)
It was so much fun!!! We all had a blast. Sariah and Kempton had fun... with just a few little kinks in the night. We were glad to take them! Now Keili keeps asking when we are going back. This is my favorite place to take the kids. I LOVE IT!!!!!

What it's like to go duck hunting with a girl...

Okay... so, I decided to go duck hunting with Dad, Dave and Rustin. I bought my license, duck stamp, gloves (which are all dogged up now) and thermals. Plus, Rustin loaned me one of his (or rather 2) camouflage coats. I was set. I get home from work on Monday night and Dave informs me that we are leaving at 3:30am. I was like.. Uh... what time again? So... I set my alarm for 3 am. I was only going to brush my teeth, put on some deodorant, my many clothes to stay warm and go... a half hour was PLENTY of time.
Well... at 2:58am Dad comes barreling down my stairs, barges in my room, I sit up fast and he goes "Tahnee... get up, we gotta go". I look at my clock, sure enough, I was not dreaming, it was 2:58am. I said "Dad, I thought we were leaving at 3:30". He said "we have to be on the road at 3:30." I was like, Uh... yeah, got it under control Dad. He leaves my room and right after walking out I hear "BEEP, BEEP, BEEP, BEEP!" It was , of course my alarm, because I HAD THIS UNDER CONTROL! Well, Dave and I got ready, we got out to the truck and left, we were about 6 minutes late leaving and Dad was not happy. We were late (keep in mind, only by 6 minutes). Well, we get around the block and ....What is this you ask? A flat tire on the boat. HOLY CRAP! Imagine Dad at this point, he was PISSED!!! It was driving me crazy not taking a picture of this to blog about... so... I quietly tried to take one with my phone, covering the speaker of course cause I knew that if Dad thought I was enjoying any part of this flat tire experience it would be all over for me. LOL.
I did not succeed. Just an FYI, even if you cover the speaker on your phone the snapping of a picture sound... does not lighten, nor go away. This picture above is of me jerking my phone as they turn around. OOPS! I just said "hey, you're going to be happy in a year when you think this is funny, that I have a picture." Even though they didn't really turn out.
Here we are at the butt crack of dawn in the boat riding out to find our "spot". Once we get there, we set up and it gets light. It was really cool to hear the shooting and wait for the ducks to come in. The guys were good at it. I kept getting told to duck. I think it's because my choice in hat left little to be desired. First of all, I should say that I was dressed like that kid in the Christmas story. I hated that part. I like to move, and how much can you move when you are a walking, talking snowman? The only camo I had on was the coat rustin gave me. I was too worried about my ears being cold that I didn't even bring my beautiful camo utes hat. I had on my black winter hat with a pom pom on top. LOL! I think this is part of the reason I had to duck more than the others. About an hour into the hunting, I had to pee. This... my friends is a problem because I was dressed in layers of clothing, with waders on, and the water was just over my knee cap. PROBLEMS all over the place!!! I said "SOOOOO... how does a girl go pee, in this get up, and in this water?" RUstin goes "Just go in that." What the.... I said " Um... hey brainiac... I don't have on a diaper under all this". Numerous jokes were thrown my way... Finally Dave goes "I'd just go across to that island, mash down the toolies, and do your thing". SO that is what I did. Now... as I crossed the great divide, my boots kept getting stuck in the mud, I had to balance my self and wedge each foot out to make it across, afraid I was going to fall in the water and that would have SUCKED! I finally made it. Did my thing, and walked out. This is what I like to call Duck Hunting Ladies Restroom:

Not my best picture by far... in fact it's really ugly,and I have no make up on, but I had to show you my hunting hat. LOL!!!
This is what I had to walk across. So... I head on my way. I get out in the middle of the two islands, in the water, and I look up there are 3 ducks flying over head. I look over at the men, and they are just standing there. I was like... holy smokes, they are missing them. 3 ducks + 3 Men=DUCK HUNTING!

Keep in mind, I am not in any camo cause I left my coat in the boat, and I have on the hat... I am standing in the middle of the two toolie islands and I yell to them, "HEY!!!!!!" you know, to get their attention, because they are MISSING THESE DUCKS! Rustin's head turns and looks at me but he stays stiff. Then... it hit me... They knew about the ducks. OOPS! And then, the ducks turn. LOL! They were not so excited. Dave's all "what are you doing?" I told them, my thoughts, my feelings, etc. And that I was returning from the restroom. They all just shook their heads and I said "WHAT! I had to pee! I am happy to report that it was a success." LOL, they just looked at me like TMI! Then I said "Welcome to duck hunting with a girl!" Dave goes "Well, this will be the last time we experience this!" ANd they all laughed. I was like Hardy, har, har.
This is me holding the motor so they could push the boat out of the reed thingy's to move to a different spot. Me and all my muskles!!!
Rustin picking up his decoys, of which I am happy to report I did NOT shoot, nor think about shooting.
Here is Rustin, watching for ducks...
Dave... slightly unhappy that he allowed a camera, let alone a girl along on this trip.
Dad.... who just thought it was funny that they were giving me a hard time about so many things...
Sassy with her first duck she retrieved. She did so good. This dumb duck kept diving in the water everytime Sassy got close to it. It was so funny! Right after this, Rustin shot a bird and when sassy retrieved it, Dad threw in on the floor of the boat but it's wing was still moving. I was like "Hey...it's alive, it's alive!" Rustin goes, "Well kill it." SO... to be funny, I took my gun (which was on safety) pointed it at the bird, on the bottom of the boat, and.... Dave and Rusting yell "STOP!!!!!" LOL! As if I was really going to shoot it. I'm not completely incompetent. But... I think it scared them to death. LOL. I know, probably not funny to most of you, but it was funny to me. LOL! Sorry.
Dad and Sassy getting the duck.
The poser!
And of course, Dave, being Dave.... LOL! Totally asleep. This is on our way back to the dock.

This is the boat we held for a stranger that had to run to get his truck. See... a good deed for the day. This made up for the duck/yelling incident.
We got 4 ducks is all, but it was fun. I had fun. I didn't get a duck. BUT Dad... well, he was AMAZING (just ask him) he shot one bullet and got one duck. He didn't even brag at all (rolling eyes). He did try to tell me that I shot it though, because I didn't get a duck. Dave got 2, Rustin got 1, and Dad got one. It was kind of a slow day. I shot like 5 times, but missed. Shoot!!! Looks like I need some shooting practice. Just so you know, Duck hunt the game... Not the same as duck hunting, nor does it make good practice for duck hunting... just sayin'.

Never a dull moment... NEVER!

So... living in Casa Rubow always proves to be adventurous entertainment. ESPECIALLY and MOSTLY because the eldest child- Davey. OH MY HECK (that is also something that frequently escapes his mouth) it is so funny to listen to this kid reason.
Case in point...
Wednesday night as we were sitting in the living room. Keili had just gotten out of the bath tub and was wrapped in a towel. Davey, had Dave's jacket on and had me zip his hands in the pockets so he could "have wings and fly" then he proceeded to jump off EVERYTHING as if he was flying. Well Dave fell asleep on the couch and Nic and I had gone upstairs for like 2 minutes. We come back down and Davey and naked Keili (remember, towel, bath...) are on the front porch (it's like 10pm) Davey has wrapped Dave's jacket aka. wings, around Keili and then proceeds to fling her, YES... FLING HER, off the porch so she can fly- literally...FLY! And he succeeded, because she did just that. Keili, in all her naked glory, flings off the porch assisted by Davey's force and slams into the cement, where Davey then begins to drag her for a few seconds as he tries to stop. Nicole gets to the bottom of the stairs just in time to witness this magical event. Keili begins to cry, Davey runs in the house. Then we notice on Keili's back are a bunch of marks. OR should I say a bunch of flesh, missing it's skin. Nic gets mad at Davey who is baffled by the fact that he would seriously be in trouble for such a thing and says (dead serious, and defensive I might add) WHAT? Sponge Bob did it! I just wanted Keili to fly, and it worked on sponge bob. It shouldn't be funny, but oh my heck. He says these things and he is dead serious. He cannot understand why it went wrong. Nic is like "Well... sponge bob is a sponge, AND a cartoon." He kept presenting his case, over and over. Like he was doing Keili a favor by helping her to fly. Poor Keili was crying. It was funny, but it wasn't. Nic covered the biggest part of the sore with a paper towel while I ran to the store to get a big bandage.

Okay... item number 2 in the Ruby home adventure...
Here is Davey, in a box (ha ha... friends joke) and Keili helping him in a box.

Keili shutting him in.

Making sure he goes NOWHERE

And then... they dump him...

ALWAYS an adventure...